What if we are so scared of being judged that we avoid the majority of feedback that would be very useful to us?
What if just accepting the reality (and being okay with) that we are judging everyone all the time and we are also being judged allows us to freely give and receive all the gifts that we have for one another?
What if we need to see and be seen by each other more and that makes us better? What if by giving just a little extra, that painfully generous amount, makes it so you see just a little better?
What if our exchange becomes like a Jimi Hendrix solo, filled with beautiful harmonic feedback that makes the thing so much richer and more fun?
If, like me, you aren't good at feedback, there is great news. It's a muscle. You can become great at it! You just have to practice. All it takes is the complete desire for true collaboration and exchange between your fellow humans and a lot of communication with a dash of bravery.
Next time you notice that unique part of someone's attire, say something. You noticed that the grocery bagger did an exceptional job? Tell them! Be generous, bring your feedback muscle out, and watch what happens. Watch how you feel. My bet is the experience will make you want to get really good at feedback.
To explore this idea further, check out this book and this TED Talk.